Lying on the sofa in the living room, Anna noticed the fragile lines of blooming dawn replacing the dark of the night coming through the drapes. They were reflected on the wall like shapeless lines of her exasperated feelings. She got up and walked to the window, pulling aside the drapes that blocking her view. The pale sun arcs were rising in far horizon. The campus was an ashen convolution of obscurities. The attenuated snow on the edges of walking path looked blue.
She thought about Steve. "Is he having a hard time to sleep? Is he thinking about me?" The memory of the night before was relieved in her mind and she wondered if Steve was reliving the event of the night before as she did. Was she special to him or just one of his dates? She did not know; nonetheless, it was very important to her to know the answer. She thought: "Surely at age twenty nine, he had dated many women!" She frowned at her own thought. "But am I the special one?"
She wondered that by acting smart and sometimes sarcastic rather than enjoying her time with him, she had perhaps antagonized him. Walking to the kitchen to drink water, she said loudly: "I'll find out." But then she recalled their last conversation, where he parked his car outside the gate of the campus.
"I had a good time." His smile was a forced one.
"So did I." Her smile was also a forced one. " I must go in now."
Suddenly he removed his hand from the steering wheel and placed it on her hand. She suffered. He sensed the shivering of that fine hand, and pulled his away, opened the door and walked to the other side of the car to open the door for her, but she was already out of the car. She noticed that there was something false in his smile. She offered her hand for a handshake; but instead, he hugged her gently. Anna unexpectedly pulled herself away from him. She was shaking all over. His pride was humiliated. He mistook her shaking for a dismay; however, her eyes said something different. He did not walk her to the apartment.
*
Spring came sooner than anyone could anticipate. Anna wanted terribly to go to Iran for her Spring Break which was also Iranian New Year; but her father told her that one week was not enough time for it. She got worried if her father's rejection was because of his dismay towards her or perhaps because he wanted to hide his extreme depression from his only child. Talking to Stacy about it did not help much.
"Your dad is right. One week is not enough time." And then she continued: "Why do you want to make a big issue about everything?"
To every one's surprise, this spring was exceptionally warm. The trees were already blooming in their pale, purple blossoms. The Cherry blossoms that were one of Washington's trade mark were already in full blooms and tourists from everywhere visiting to see them. The other trees had a glittering green luster. The little leaves on the branches unfolded from their rolled state to little leaves. The beautiful Washington was filled with spring flowers, flourishing trees, and a mild, soothing breeze. It was an extraordinary spring.
Stacy offered Anna to go to her parents' home for that week. Anna politely refused. She needed to be alone for awhile. She had not heard a word from Steve since that one date they had had about a months and half ago; and her pride would not allow her to ask Stacy about him. All she knew were things that she had learned in casual conversation with Stacy. She knew that he was overseas for awhile concerning his job. She was certain now that Steve was not thinking about her. "I antagonized him that night." She felt sure of it. She had pondered ever since that one date. "How come he didn't say good bye to me before leaving!" Finally she came to understanding that it was over. "So, let it be that way."
To Be Continued
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