Sunday, August 8, 2010

Odyssey ... 3- Falling in ...

Dallas-
On that fall afternoon, as another autumn day in Dallas, the copious rain pours violently. A bleak wind makes its way through the cracks of window. Hana, despondently, think back again of the days of having an imaginary friend for just the sake of having a friend. She recollects life without her benevolent and innocent father. After a long interval, she picks the pen and writes a poem about her dad. She will burn it before Hamid finds it and tell her that she is so sentimental, or even stupid.
"O, daddy, remember your little girl!
The tiny creature who stayed in her room;
Unaware of your hard work, mom's toiling;
Or clothes she wore, food she ate.
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O, daddy, remember the days of my depression!
I wouldn't talk to you, but you insisted.
Your love and care drove me mad, did you notice?
How could I hide such a hatred from your warm eyes?
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O, daddy, remember all of our mistakes!
Yours, mine, how naive we were!
We believed in everyone, you trusted all.
And all those agonies made me to run away from you.
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O, daddy remember that apple tree in our house!
Which was planted the day I was born.
And you always said I and apple tree were the same age.
And it died after we sold the house.
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O, daddy, this morning I woke up shaking of horror-
One of those nightmares, you know them.
I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror;
And saw the mother, the old mom in me.
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O, daddy, you and I are from the same root.
We believe, we trust, and then we get hurt.
I am not changed, how about you?
Even though life has separated us like death.
Tehran-
To Hana's extreme surprise, mom sold her two antique silver candle holder to use the money for sending her daughter to that privet English class, as they had planned it before. Even though Hana was so overwhelmed, she felt guilty of putting pressure on her mom in that financial catastrophe. She had not shown her want of that class by spoken words, but somehow mom knew and that was why she sold her favorite candle holder that dad had given her as a gift many years earlier.
That was the first time Hana was doing something besides going to school. The privet English class was not close to their home. Every other day after her school, she rode a bus to go to that class. That was an interesting adventure for her since it was the first time she got to go far from home by herself. The guilt of not being home to defend mom from all the nuisance did not stop her to feel that ecstasy- the blissful act of an adult, riding a bus, being in a class with students much older than her, and exploring. She overcame the fear of riding a bus on a fifteen kilometers trip very fast. The first time she was just anxious not to get in the wrong bus; however, when she began feeling confident, she always got on a Double- Decker bus and sat on the second level. Not many people chose up there. She normally had that level all to herself.
Sitting next to the window, she watched the streets, people, and traffic. Her thoughts were flown here and there by the strange twist of life, as she was introduced to it at such young age. A faded reflection of dad, tall figure, Mesa, and hard working mom occupied her mind. She wondered what dad was doing in Tabriz in his brother's home. According to mom, he was handling it very well. Mom said that she talked to him everyday; but Hana was never home when they talked.
In the class, among mostly adult students, she felt like a small molecule in a whole of a body. The first day teacher asked all students about their occupation, interest, and the reason they wanted to learn English. Most of those people were working and wanted to learn English either for their jobs or taking the KONKOR (the nationwide exam fro entering university). Hana was the youngest. "I'm in tenth grade. I want to learn English so I can read books written in English." Bu that was only the first day. As uneasy as she felt being among students, her parents age mostly, she defeated that anxiety by her only weapon- being the best. Every time teacher asked a question, that nobody knew the answer, he turned to Hana, and she always had the answer. The teacher called her: "Little smart girl,". Very soon students put their arrogance aside and came to her for help before the class. That made her not to feel like a molecule anymore.
In order not to give her evening with her imaginary friend, Mesa, she did her homework in the bus going back home. A young boy, who often rode the same bus and sat on the second level, first aggravated her. She felt as though someone had occupied her property; nevertheless, she slowly began to like the boy's presence on the other side of isle. Sometimes she looked outside and other times she studied; but occasionally she took a glimpse of the young boy and when she realized he was looking at her also, she shyly turned her face to the window and her downcast eyes reached for a view that did not exist.
The Three months life of the privet class came to an end quicker than a spring shower. It was also the end of school year. She instinctively did not ask her mom for enrolling in summer semester because of all the difficulties mom had in dad's absence. Hana never got to know the young boy's name. She never volunteered to talk.
Dallas-

To Be Continued

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