"You know they've done a lot of research these days to cure Aids. The death rate because of these researches have dropped tremendously in recent years. May be you have a chance."
Tim hissed at Ed with clenched teeth, as his irate brown eyes glared at him with disgust:
"It's all about prolonging a miserable and shameful life, nothing else. I don't want to be a guinea pig. No, that's not the way I want to die. I have no one to consider living for, I have no family, no wife, no children, thanks to you. I am alone, have been alone, and I die alone on my own terms.
"I'm not regretful of the people I might have infected; but I am very much ashamed of not telling Rosa. I've truly liked her, loved her. I'm hoping that she is okay. I've made sure that she is okay. I haven't even kissed her lips since I found about I was HIV positive. Ask her. She knows it. She thought that I didn't love her anymore; but she didn't know that loving her was the reason of not kissing her.
"I know there is not any amount of money in this world to outweigh the suffering I may have caused her; however, I thought by willing everything I have, I mean everything, to her, I may offset just a little of the pain I've brought to her. Besides I have no one else.
"You may not believe this, but it's true. I am talking about my feelings for Rosa. Most of the time my feeling for her had been a fatherly one; but I couldn't tell her that. So I had to play the role of a lover. I'm sure she is going to be okay..."
"Who are you to tell me that I'll be okay? Are you a doctor or an oracle? And I don't need your stuff. I want my life back." Rosa said, distorting her face in an expression of an intense anger.
Tim got up from his chair, walked to Rosa, who was sitting next to Jacob, and looked at her with a look that was not familiar to Rosa, a benevolent stare. Rosa was shaking. Her trembling was so obvious that everyone noticed it. To avoid that shaking, she tried to get up, but her knees could not handle her weak, shaky body, and before collapsing, Tim got hold of her, gathered the hopeless woman into his arms, and covered her face with teary kisses.
"Rosa, I am so, so sorry..."
Then he almost handed her to Jacob, and went back to his seat and sat with a somber and mournful face.
Diana, who had not stopped crying since the news of her daughter's well being, came to Rosa, knelt down in front of her, and hugged her knees. She felt for Rosa a deep, profound love, as though she was her own daughter.
"Sweet heart, I know you'll be okay. We go to have you checked out just this morning, even before calling Vickie."
Rosa suddenly calmed down by this motherly love of a mother she had found the night before. She made Diana to get up and sit next to her. The feeling to sit between Jacob and Diana brought back her inherent strength. She blinked away her tears, looked straight in Tim's direction, and said with a shaky voice:
"Can you believe yesterday evening we came here because we had so much hatred in us. I half way destroyed their daughter and look at them how they show me so much love. You half way destroyed me, now look at you how you show me love. When first I met you, I found you such an interesting conversationalist. Talking to you for me then was like facing a situation of greater danger. At first I was frightened, but later I became courageous. Our relationship to me was like an adventurous journey when one faces risks along with pleasure. Sometimes I felt in love with you, other times, I hated you, sometimes I liked you, other times I detested you. But never, never. I thought of this kind of danger, my life; even though we both liked to play dangerous games. I don't know what to think or feel now. I want to be mad, angry, but I'm not anymore. I want to hate you, but I don't. It's funny, I understand why you didn't tell me. I think I would have done the same if I was you. I now can forgive you, even if I am infected. Now you can die in peace. Now if you want me, I can help you die peacefully."
To Be Continued
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