Aggravated Steve put the baby, with his arms still stretched towards his mother, in Helen's arms. Chris became
quiet immediately. How strange that Helen had made Steve a father twice against her will, and the children picked her to love! Of curse they loved their father, too; specially Elizabeth! But Mama was their world! No one was there to tell this man that love of the children for their mothers was such a natural phenomenon; that their mother spent all her time with hem; that mothers knew every aches and pains of them; that mothers knew every joy and sorrow of them! Helen was the one who took them to the doctor, who knew exactly when was time for their vaccine, their checkups. She let them play, taught them to share, to socialize, and to be good with other children in their neighborhood's afternoon gathering. She was their God, and they were her life.
Steve was never home. He would be home only for three days. Lately he had gotten into the habit of going out to bars with his male friends, that was what he claimed. He would not come back home until midnight when the children were already in bed, sleeping; and Helen pretended to be sleep. Nonetheless, he was drunk! He had no consideration for Helen, who had all day taken care of the children and the house.
He, being drunk, always threw himself on bed; but this act was not because he was drunk, but because he wanted to hurt Helen, He did not care that how he annoyed her by this act specially since he did not know that she was not asleep. He almost without a doubt had her forcefully! She hated the smell of alcohol mixed with smoke. He knew it; therefore insisted on prolonging his kisses on her mouth. Even in his drunkenness, he knew that she did not want him. He would slapped her face; tore her night gown; and once that she tried to run out of the room, he got hold of her long, golden hair and pulled them so hard that by the time Helen was able to release herself from his claws, a whole bunch of her hair stayed in his hand!
A weary feeling of despondency at her own isolation, her being without friend, her alienation from this world overshadowed her entire world. She needed to do something and do it fast! She was afraid that one day he would kill her in one of these rages he displayed! On the other hand, he had told her more than once that if she ever talked to anyone about their personal life or thought about divorcing him, he would kill her and the children and then himself. She truly believed him. He had his collection of guns along with all his medals from his service in Vietnam in the safe. She knew where the safe was; it was right there in the study. She had tried all kind of combination that made sense to her, but was not able to figure it out! She recalled how she had learned the combination of the safe in Roger's house! But this safe was not hidden. it was right there. Everybody could see it. But every time he was in that room, he locked the door from inside and closed all the drapes. Not even once he made the mistake that Roger had made. Helen was sure that if she ever opened the safe, she would find the papers with the identity of the couple who had adopted her first born, the son that Jacob had fathered!!
To Be Continued
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