Helen knew in what perplexity hereafter she was suffering; and what apathetic torment was teaching her the secret of a little joy! This new elation was not losing Jacob, but was gaining part of him! She was not thinking about the future, about when Steve would return and would find out that she was pregnant! Those were things for future. For now she had part of a man she loved and loved him only, with carrying part of him with her at all times; listening to its heart beats as if she was listening to jacob's heart heaving when he had taken her in his arms and made love to her!
She heard from her friends at college that this man coming everyday and asking for her; however she had made up her mind to let him go to his wife and his son. She craved him like a mad woman; but she decided from the two of them he needed to be saved and to have a normal life. She believed in the cliche: "Time heals at wounds!" She was certain that Jacob eventually would froget about her!
"Hereafter, he'll love his wife again and forget about me!" She kept saying this to herself. She sent a message to him through a friend:
"Stop coming after me! You're ruinning my career and yours! I don't love you. My Steve is retiriung and coming home soon. I've realized he's the man I love. Go to your family and let me go to mine! Please for God's sake leave me alone. I don't love you. It was all a big lie. It was all a big mistake; it was all about sex!"
She cried for two days when she heard that Jacob had received her message. She knew that he did not believe her; but she also knew that she had injured his pride. The only thing that now she had to hide form everybody was her pregnancy until some God sent wisdom hit her on the head. She did not want to quit her job, yet she did not want anyone know that she was pregnant There was no way by passing days that she would go for abortion as the doctor had recommended, beside the fact that it was illegal then. She would keep this baby even if Steve would kill her. Now this baby was her true love; her new Jacob!
By Christmas, her clothes were tight on her and she had to wear big sweaters to hide the little pouch of her stomach. Luckily she had no sickness concerning this pregnancy. No one knew! No one was suspicious. She had seen Jacob a few times when she was leaving the college. He normally stood by the main building just in case she would change her mind. On these occasions, she would always walk back inside the building and stayed inside until he got tired of waiting and left!
To Be Continued
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