Odyssey... {~}27- Grandpa's Nature

When Hana growing up, she saw so much of her adored grandpa. In fact, she loved him so much that she spent more time in her grandparents' than her home except the school time. That was how her friendship with Behroz, her uncle, who was only three years older than her, began. As Gol, her mom, learned kindness from her father, Nabi, her uncle, learned love for land from him, Behroz and Hana learned the love and admiration for literature and poetry from that devoted man. When Behroz and Hana were at the age that they could read books, he asked them to read him the magical contents of poetry books to him. By listening only one time, he was able to memorize them all. He was a walking knowledge of all those books himself. Later on Hana believed that she inherited the love for chanting poetry and writing from her grandpa. Behroz also believed he owed his great knowledge of literature to his father. As a teenager, Behroz was Hana's best friend and grandpa was her confidant, one who could answer all her questions about life and satisfy all her curiosities. She loved to stay at her grandparents' home overnight on holidays and weekends. While reading books and discussing different issues with Behroz in the evenings, she used the day time to go to grandpa's garden, where he was taking care of his trees and flowers and anything that grow from earth. There, she would start by asking grandpa if he needed help, and then slowly she would bombard him with her questions. As big as their family was, there was always something going on, and she used the current situations to ask his opinion.

His ideas of right and wrong were simple; nonetheless, there was so much wisdom in it that not only Hana remembered them, she also acted upon them. However, as a teenager one thing always confused her and she brought that issue to grandpa's attention one day:

"Grandpa, you've always said if we do the right thing, we'll be the ultimate winner in life. What if that day of winning never comes? What if you get hurt because of doing the right thing?"

He smiled and put his arm around her shoulder and kissed her on forehead and then said:

"Sweetheart, we people always want instant gratification. We want to see the result of our right doing quickly. If everybody was honest, it could happen, but this is not the case. Life is a series of good and bad and we're bound to endure the bad and enjoy the good. But remember good always prevails. It may take time, but it will happen. Look at these trees, see how tall and healthy they are. Look at their fruits. They are not only enough for all of us, I give a lot of them to neighbors and friends. Do you think these trees were like this from beginning?"

Hana, bewildered, was not sure what grandpa meant.

"I don't know why you're talking about trees!"

"Patience is what I'm going to teach you today. The day I planted these trees, you weren't even born. If I wanted immediate satisfaction, I would go crazy to see the very slow process of the growing, but I didn't. I was enjoying the progress of their growing; and I knew one day they would be tall, healthy, and full of fruits, whether I would be around or not."

Hana suddenly understood what grandpa meant.

"But what if something happened to you and you never saw them grow."

"That is possible, too. I'll die one day, but these trees will live with or without me because they all have good foundation. The important fact is that I enjoyed very much watching my trees and taking care of them. Whether I see the result or not is irrelevant; and remember death is inevitable. We die, as our ancestors did. Even these trees can't live forever. Our lives is like a second compare to the life of universe. What we leave behind is as important as the path we choose, for it is the path that matters not the destination."

Hana looked at her beloved grandpa, as he was pulling weeds, and learned the best lesson anyone had ever taught her. She adored this man, who used every anger of nature or society to learn or to teach. While she was about to go inside to explore the different part of her soul and mind with her uncle, Behroz, grandpa would always say:

"What about reading me some SHAHNAMEH."

"Yes, grandpa. I love to read you. Let me go get the book."

When grandpa's health began to deteriorate, everyone blamed it on his spending too much time outside. The family thought the dampness in winter was dangerous to his health, as he was a man of nature, and sky was his roof; and he did not care of being wet either by watering his garden or rain or snow. Family tried to make him spend more time inside, where they had a central heater in their newly built modern house for winter and a sophisticated air conditioner for hot summer days; but that was like putting him in prison. His excruciating coughing was heard from a far distance while he smoked one cigarette after the other. To take away what he worshipped seemed like a crime to him. Everyone assumed he had bronchitis or asthma and they began treating him with home remedies. It was Nabi, his son, who confronted his mother and said:

"Mother, dad is sick. I am taking him to a doctor."

Grandma, actually wanted him to go to see a doctor, it was grandpa himself that thought home remedy could cure his dry and painful coughing.

Six months later, grandpa was the permanent occupant of his bed, fighting a vain battle with lung cancer. Hana, who was married and had children at the time, visited him everyday and watched how that sacred man was melting away. The treatment and even a journey to London, England, to visit the best specialist, did not do any good; and as the lung cleared of those deadly cells, first his neck and then his brain were filled with the disease. The injection of morphine eased the pain temporary, but when its effect subsides, he twisted in pain and wished for a quick death. Hana felt it was better they would let him die, for all the doctors had said he would. She was very angry at her family, the ones that were in charge, whom were trying to delay the inevitable death. She hated to see him suffer so much. Seven months after the initial diagnosis, grandpa died. As all women screamed and pulled their hair, the customary mourning, Hana went to his garden to be with him for the last time. She walked amongst his trees, shrubs, and flowers and brought back the memory of grandpa in the garden with her; the reading of the poetry books, asking his advice, and his love for her and hers for him. Six months after grandpa's death, the revolution began. Hana was extremely happy that he had died before revolution. As well as she knew him, she was certain that if he was alive. he could not get along with those shameless people who stole people's revolution, and he would be arrested and executed rather than dying by natural cause.

Dallas-

Thinking of grandpa gives Hana a special kind of light, a gloomy hope that she can handle this crisis as many others; and the best way to resolve her problem with Farhad is to ignore him. She remembers her grandpa's description of right and wrong, and how right always prevails with enough patience. She suddenly realizes that she has not done anything wrong and Farhad will come around and accept the new situation if she is patient enough. However she regrets for one time that she did not listen to her grandpa, marrying Hamid.

To Be continued

Odyssey... ~{}~27- Grandpa's Nature

The slim man with bony cheeks and big nose had the warmest and kindest eyes that Hana had ever seen, His very short hair was all white like a soft layer of snow on the dead winter grass. As a matter of fact his hair had always been white, or at least that was how Hana remembered. He loved his garden, trees, and flowers, His love for nature always amused Hana. He hated family disputes and as big as his family was, there was always one going on insides the walls; therefore, he chose the outside, under the roof of sky, in any season or weather, to be close to a nature that its argument was snow or rain, sunshine or cloud. He watched closely how the trees came to life, began budding, leaves appeared, and gradually became bigger and greener, and how they slowly changed colors and fell on the earth, and how the weather changed from pleasant to warm, cold, or icy. It was his connection with nature that made him a spiritual man not his belief in religion. In fact, he was not religious at all which was strange for his time. He was illiterate, yet so much in love with literature. His knowledge of poetry was so great that he knew books of poetry by heart. As he walked in his garden and cherished nature's exhibition, he murmured verses of those books he knew by heart. He chanted poems of his own which no one ever wrote them down.

For his time, he was financially well off. At younger age, before marrying his wife, he had bought a piece of land with his share of family inheritance. He had immediately begun planting trees, flowers, and vegetables and built a house to bring his young bride home. He had farmed in the most part of that land; and the crop was produced from his land had had the best quality. Soon, not only he was able to support his family but to buy more lands. His long hours of working was not for accumulating more lands or money but it was for his pure love for earth; nonetheless, when his first two children were still very young, he had become a very rich man. Money never changed him; in fact, he was as humble as when he did not have any. The community respected him so much that everyone consulted him for any kind of problems or joyous events like weddings. He replaced Molas (Muslim priests) for many and became their confidant.

His third child, a boy, was born thirteen years after the second child, another boy. It just happened that way, as in his time, no one knew the use of any methods to prevent unwanted pregnancy. Two years after the birth of his last child, his first one, Gol, got married. He was very much against that since his sixteen years old daughter was still a child in his mind but not in the mind of the society in that era. But for those days any age later than that for a girl to marry, was an absolute disgrace for her parents. Gol's marriage was like a warning to him. He hated to see her go, after all, gol was the one always read him from all those books especially SHAHNAMEH, ( THE BOOK OF KINGS) by Ferdousie. Her leaving home caused his withdrawal; and as he walked in his lands and talked to nature, he made his ultimate decision in his life. By the time, Hana, his first grand child was born, he very much knew his future plan. He decided to give everything he had to his three children. He bought a piece of land close to where he lived and built a house in it for Gol and her family which was growing fast. By doing that he could have his daughter close by. He was a man of walking and feeling. To him, getting in a bus and sitting there for half an hour to go to his daughter's house , who at the time was living with her in- laws, was the greatest pain. he turned the title of the house to Gol and her husband, Davoud, blissfully and helped them to move from Tehran to Shemiran ( a suburb of Tehran). In a few years, when his second child, Nabi, was old enough, he gave him his share and saved some for his youngest child, Behroz.

To Be Continued

Odyssey... ~~27- Grandpa's Nature

Hana is happy that she is not going to work. She has never used her sick days anyway. Now she has a day off on Monday without being bothered by problems of facing Farhad after their last night fight.

Opening the windows, she tries to air her apartment. She needs to breathe the fresh air not the artificial one. As she still carries an illusion of her nightmare combined with a warm feeling of an unexpected deviation, she roams with her pajamas on in the rooms thinking about what will she do with Farhad. She is terrified to give in to her son's unreasonable and uncommon way of life for her. The day of lifting all the mystifying unclarity has come to her. To give up this new her seems unfair and inhumane; nevertheless, to ignore Farhad's demand frightens her of losing him. Consequently, she comes to believe that with all the unusual and daring things she has done in her life, she is and has been a timid person who lets close people around her use her. Now that the reckoning day of her life has arrived, and her hesitation has ended, she must solve this major problem. How can she open this twisted knot? How can she ignore this part of her, Farhad, whom she loves so much? While in her thoughts, she gradually softens and feels if she did not have freedom and friends before, she can live without them now, an exasperated anguish fills her and she breaks into a hysterical cry.

When two nights ago she was with Mario, for the first time she felt young and vivid. It was a new experience that felt good. When they stood by the lake, in silence, she explored intensely that new gratification. She liked the respect Mario had for her and she for him. She did not want that night to end while their minds were occupied by that mutual understanding. Now, today, she is miserable. She has missed work, and she does not know how to face her son in the afternoon. Exhaustion is what she senses the most.

When she finally stops walking in her small apartment, she makes herself comfortable in her favorite place on the sofa with her ashtray and cup of coffee and decides to write a poem. In past, writing has always relaxed her and has taken her away from problems. She writes:

"Tears and laughter tire me.

And people who cry or laugh to be free.

And everything which may happen as surprise.

And men who plant or get up at sunrise.

I am weary of hours, days, and abyss.

And all the scattered buds never see the bliss.

I am tired of ambition, power and charm.

And everything else but sleeping without alarm.

When I exhale, my breath becomes a dark cloud.

It stands like an adamant wall, forgets the crowd.

Should one's breath be what mine is,

Do I need friends for any ease?"

~

Searching for an answer to this new problem, Hana travels to past to ask a man of wisdom, a man whose words had always been the ultimate enlightenment not only for his family but for the entire community, a man of insight and solution. That sacred man never passed any judgment as other did; and treated people with respect and equality; for he worshipped the life and living things like humans, animals, plants, trees, and everything else that needed growth and nurturing. Hana conjures up those days to be with that man, talk to him, feel him, and love him once again, for he was a living God on earth for her.

To Be Continued

Odyssey... 27- Grandpa's Nature

The island is filled with flowers, so many different kinds. The ocean and sky are intermingled like a lustrous diamond and their graces blend together uncommonly. Hana sees the enchanted transformation of that jewel unveiled. Walking at the seashore in an exalted detachment, an old music resounds inside her ears, and she murmurs that forgotten song. As she walks bare footed on the soft sands, an adored breeze tingles her skin and blows her hair. she breathes the freshest air and lets freedom raises her skirt, blows her hair, and sinks into her skin. The waves are piled upon each other and as they smoothly run to the bank, she sees behind the last wave in far horizon a ship. Curious and astonished, she looks intensely to identify the ship or ignore her blurry vision. As waves moves up and down and forward, she sees more of the ship. "It's perhaps a sailing boat." She thinks. The seabirds come to the shore and she takes a big piece of bread out of her pocket, and as she cuts the bread into small pieces and throws them into the air so the birds can catch them playfully, she hears the sound of a horn. Consequently, for a minute she has forgotten about the ship; however, the horn reminds her of something out there. As the sun rises, where the sky and ocean are intermixed, she looks towards the spot where she has last seen the ship; but the fresh, newly born rays of sun pierce her eyes through and she turns her face away. Something inside warns her to stay away from the ship. She runs to the opposite direction of the shore, where she finds a big rock and hides behind it while every few minutes peeking. She hears many sounds. In ambiguity, she can not recognize any words or languages, but soon the voices become clear. Mostly she hears Persian speaking people. They all are calling her. She hears her name, Hana, Hana... It is her mother. She leaves her hidden place to join her mother, but what she sees is a huge sailing boat on the sand off the water. She thinks how the boat can get there, and then : "Perhaps they carried it out there." The boat is like a big square box with hundreds of windows and black roof. The sails are at the top of the roof and they move like colorful flags of Iran and America. The box is not a boat anymore but a house and she sees behind each window two bloody hands which are reaching for her. Then she sees eyes, all red and bloody. They all look alike and she can not know who they are. However, in a strange twist, day becomes night and so many bright lights makes the house like a ball of fire. A loud music is played inside and many doors open and people leave the house. They all walk in a line and each bows to Hana when passes her. First in line is Hamid, all wrapped like an Egyptian Mummy. Then is her father, who limps and ignores her. Mother looks fat and ugly like a gypsy. Van walks straight but there is a hole in his torso; and Saeid is all bloody and surrounded by fog and does not look at her. When they all pass her, she sees Mario, who is tied to a tree and Farhad is standing next to him with a shotgun. Then in the back ground the words of the song becomes clear to her: "Betrayal, betrayal, morbid, morbid."

The rays of the fall morning sun brightens her room. She, sitting on her bed, shakes from head to toe and is wet all over of an unwanted sweat from her horrifying nightmare. She rubs her eyes as though she can erase her vision of what she has seen; and when slowly she stops trembling, she realizes that it is ten in the morning. She is three hours late to work. Staggering to the living room, she notices that Farhad's bedroom door is open and he has gone to work. Not knowing what to do since she has never missed a day of work, considering her new job; she goes to phone to call her work. She still does not know what to say when the operator answers.

"Ruth, it is me, Hana. I'm very sick. I want to come to work but headache is killing me."

"Don't worry about it. Just stay home and rest. I tell Bob that you're sick."

To Be Continued